A quick confession here: I’m very creative when it comes to excuses. I can “riff” an excuse as easily as a jazz brass player can with music. Fortunately for me, they’ve been rather dissatisfying for some time. Doesn’t stop me from trying to use them once in a while.
Of course, there is a difference between an excuse and a reason. Hunting for a reason will reveal steps that can be taken to correct the issue. Throwing up excuses is bailing out to avoid dealing with the issue. This much is pretty much known.
When I was in elementary school, I would sometimes climb over/through a fence closing off an access road so as to get to school faster. Normally a friend or two walked with me and we would talk each other through it. The first time I tried to tackle it solo, I didn’t have the confidence to do it on my own. I was already pretty much committed to this route, as I had already missed the school bus. What I did not have, however, was the inner push needed to get beyond the fence. I briefly took stock of the situation and decided that I needed additional motivation. I reached into my backpack and pulled out my prize: Dad had given me a paperback copy of the classic book I, Robot by Isaac Asimov. No way would I be parted from this book. Feeling sick to my stomach, I gingerly tossed the book over the fence and saw it land softly on the other side. Now I knew I had to get through. Several times I would have aborted, but each time all I had to do was look at my book on the other side. Needless to say, I made it through.
As I get to know myself more and more, I find that I know what excuses I might try in a given situation. Armed with this knowledge, I then proceed to eliminate or minimize them so that I am left with nothing but reasons. Necessity being the mother of invention, I find that I’m able to do much better if I can apply a little pressure to myself. Interestingly it works better if I’m the one applying the pressure, rather than outside forces. I tend to rebel.
As such, my strategies for dealing with excuses are varied, but I do have a few old favorites:
- The Cortez method. (See the story above)
- Isolation, so as to remove distractions/third party interference.
- Doing preliminary work to tip the odds of success in my favor. This can be anything from researching a topic before it’s needed, to clearing out a room of junk before a creative project.
- Calling the bluff. If I can’t plan or work around the possibility of the excuse, I’ll endeavor to keep it in mind, so that if it pops up, I’ll recognize it for what it is. Recognition turns a simple excuse into a conscious decision, which puts the ball in my court.
- Last but not least, I find that the more I am in a state of peace and acceptance, the excuses lose power fast. There is no need for excuses when there is no need to be defensive. Given my development over the years, this one is relatively new, but is turning out to be a pleasant surprise.
I find that when I successfully anticipate my excuses, and plan around them, I can give a lot more focus to the real matter at hand.
Do you have any methods for dealing with excuses that have served you well? Please share them in the comments!
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